Random Stuff of Me: Archive

You need a sense of humour to enjoy sex...

Clunking teeth together when kissing.

Ouch! You’re leaning on my hair!

I’m cumming… I’m cumming… slip… nevermind, lost it.

Slip OUCH!

Ugh, hang on, I’ve got hair stuck in my mouth/throat.

Choke, gag, splutter, cough, cough, cough.

Ugh, this isn’t comfortable, where’s the lube? Umm… … ???

Umm… darling… move your face! Quick! I can’t help it, I’m about to fart!

AH! That TICKLES! Squirm, wiggle, accidently knee him in a sensitive area. OUCH!

Shlurps, squeeges, vaginal raspberries, and various other far from charming sounds.

CRAMP!!!

Jun 29, 2011

#sex #realities of sex #it's not like in the movies

Jun 29, 201117 notes

Random advice: Never ask a question unless you are willing to accept the worst possible answer. Some people don't care if the truth hurts, others care enough to not lie to you.

Jun 29, 2011

Jun 28, 20116 notes

Best of Autocorrect

i am dying. oh dear god.

MOTTSAPPLESAUCE

tears streaming down my face

laawwwllll

I’m not eating her out, i’m eating her out

T.G.I.Fibromyalgia will forever be my favorite thing.

FOREVER REBLOG

poophole. HAHAHAHAHAHA

juicy easter dick.

ROFL! My phone has done similar things to me, but not as good as these ones.

Jun 28, 201180,710 notes

Jun 28, 2011166 notes

Jun 28, 20113,219 notes

Hide and seek for adults.

hakuna-matatta:

HOLY SHIT

o: i wanna play hide and seek like that!

LIKE A MOTHERFUCKING BOSS

THE DEFINITION OF SWAG.

WHAT IS FUCKING AIR?!?!?!?!!?

HOLY FUCKING SHIT OH MY GOD O_O

I NEED TO DO THIS WITH MY FRIENDS.

Hahaha, that’s awesome.

Jun 28, 201150,308 notes

Jun 28, 201130,547 notes

Spell your name without an E,R,S,H,K,I,M,L,C,A,Y,N

thebeautyindestruction:

D o gg

thats all i can do.

Danielle —— Gagnon.

no, u cannot know my middle name.

The best I can do is with my full name, it ends up as “…th D..w…b…”

Jun 28, 201119,343 notes

Jun 28, 2011215 notes

Jun 26, 2011100 notes

Random advice: When driving a vehicle, keep your wheels facing straight ahead if you're stopped waiting to make a turn across oncoming traffic. If someone from behind hits your car and you have your wheels turned in the direction you intent to go, you will be pushed not only forward into any crossing traffic but also into the oncoming traffic you're waiting to pass you, doubling your chances of being hit a second time. By keeping the wheels straight until you actually make that turn, you can only be pushed forward.

Jun 26, 2011

Phew!

He’s awake, called me. Feels sick, poor bugger.

It’s annoying knowing someone you care about is sick when you live too far away to be there to look after them. :(

Jun 26, 2011

OMFG

I offered to give a friend a wake up call to make sure he didn’t sleep through his alarm again. If he gets to work late again he’s going to be in deep shit, so I’ve tried to help but… he won’t answer! I’ve been calling non-stop for over half an hour now. Phone is going flat so I have to put it on charge for a while. I can only hope the reason he’s not answering is because he’s already up and in the shower or left already or something.

eesh

Jun 26, 2011

Jun 26, 2011130 notes

Ten Words You Need to Stop Misspelling.

lepetitamoureux:

funniestposts:

YES YES YES YES! THIS is a grammar nazi’s delight <3

Jun 24, 201158,408 notes

Jun 22, 201112 notes

Jun 22, 201124 notes

( 2 Points ) My name:
( 2 Points ) My last name:
( 5 Points ) Take a stab at my middle name:
( 3 Points ) Who am I in love with:
( 2 Points ) Where did we meet:
( 2 Points ) What kind of car do I drive:
( 2 Points ) Where do I work:
( 3 Points ) Something that I am afraid of:
( 2 Points ) Do I smoke:
( 3 Points ) Do I drink:
( 2 Points ) Do I have any siblings:
( 2 Points ) How many:
( 1 Point ) Do I like ‘em:
( 4 Points ) What’s one of my favorite things to do:
( 2 Points ) How many piercings do I have:
( 3 Points ) Name a song that I love:
( 4 Points ) Am I shy or outgoing:
( 3 Points ) Am I a rebel or do I follow the rules:
( 2 Points ) What’s my favorite color:
( 3 Points ) Name something I hate:
( 4 Points ) Name a talent I have:
( 4 Points ) Do I have any pets:
( 5 Points ) What is the color of my room:
( 5 Points ) Give me a movie or TV quote that I love:
( 5 Points + on creativeness ) If I were stranded on a desert island, what would I bring:

70-75 Points; Stalker Extraordinaire!
60-69 Points; Hard-Working Stalker
50-59 Points; Decent Stalker
20-49 Points; Stalker-In-Training
00-19 Points; Fail Stalker or New Stalker

-End Transmission-

Jun 22, 201155,857 notes

Random Stuff of Me

June 2011

142 posts